we just won't be defeated

happy birthday

 
Marta is one year old today.  And what a year it's been.  Happy birthday!  I love ya, baby!
 

my sweet baby

we are the world

Maybe you couldn't tell, but I was pretty darn pleased with how KttD X: St. Valentine's Day Massacre went down.  There was one thing, however, that was a little disappointing.  A few weeks prior to the big day, I got an email from Matyas suggesting that a good way to commemorate the tenth year of our little karaoke contest would be for all of the former champions to sing as a group.  I thought it was a great idea, and presented it to Dabysan, who suggested the perfect song: "We Are the World."  We were both stoked.  I watched the video on Youtube about thirty times that day, and I'm pretty sure Daby watched it even more than I did.

Obviously, it didn't happen, which is a shame.  But we were already one champ down when Doc Paradox foolishly decided that he and his wife weren't flying in from San Francisco.  We took another hit to our ranks when Benedict Akaijen informed us the day before the big weekend that she had made plans - plans that could have occurred at any other time - to go away for the weekend.  (I don't blame Aussie Bob.  Everybody knows he had no say in the matter.)  But the real death knell for our group effort was a DJ who was a stickler for the rules.  Now, I'm not complaining, per se - we've been burned by the terrible DJ before - but nobody wanted to give up their second song.  "Lord" Ramsey took one for the team and changed his tune, but it was too little too late.  The evening was over before we got to it.  Oh, and they claimed not to have the song anyway.

Anyway, the point is "We Are the World" has been in the news recently since it was announced the song would be re-recorded to benefit earthquake victims in Haiti.  Hell, it's even been parodied already.  Which is why I'm glad to see that Shane MacGowan, Nick Cave, Mick Jones, Chrissie Hynde, Glen Matlock, and - on guitar - Johnny Depp got together recently to record Screamin' Jay Hawkins' classic "I Put a Spell On You" to raise money for the stricken nation.  It's a way better song, and, frankly, a better group of singers.  I just wish they'd found something for Huey Lewis to do.

Shane MacGowan and Friends - I Put A Spell On You

In other news, Shane MacGowan is still alive.  I wouldn't have guessed that.

loggins and matyas

There's not a whole lot at this point left to be said about Karaoke to the Death X.  Or at least, not until the hype machine kicks into gear next January.  Besides, it's only fitting to let our new champion have the last word.  Excelsior!

Whenever I Call You Friend

Matyas

judge baker

Anyone who follows the NFL knows that a disproportionate amount of superstar quarterbacks come from western Pennsylvania.  You've got your Johnny Unitas.  Your Joe Namath.  Your Joe Montana.  Your Dan Marino and Jim Kelly and Charlie Batch.  Well, it seems a similar dynamic is happening in the glorious sport of bad karaoke.  It's becoming increasingly clear that northern Ohio is a cradle of bad karaoke talent.  The only multiple-time champion - yours truly - hails from Toledo in the northwest corner of the state.  Our newly-crowned champion Matyas calls Cleveland home.  And the highest rated rookie in this year's strong class - Liz Judge - is another native of the Mistake on the Lake.  When we ever get around to building our Hall of Fame, it should probably be located someplace like, oh I don't know.... Canton.

Sweet Love

Liz Judge

soo doh zevon

Sheesh.  This title is even worse than the Trashbodies would have been.  I really didn't think this thing through.

Werewolves of London

Soo Doh Nim

Soo Doh Nim is one of the most intellegent people I've ever met in my life, but he's not a good Scrabble player.  We were playing once a few years back and he played LOOFAH for about nine points.  He wasted two high point tiles and opened up a line to a triple-word score for me.  I kicked his ass because he would rather play a clever word than win.  He has the same problem in Karaoke to the Death.  Sure, he coasted to victory in KttD IV on the strength of his awkward dance moves and a down year, but in recent years it has seemed he lacks the drive to compete at the highest level.  Some of his song choices have truly been inspired, but they're just not that hard to sing.  This year was no exception.  His belief that he can actually sing is a powerful weapon in Soo's arsenal.  It may also be greatest limitation. 

Black Cow

Soo Doh Nim

[i can't think of a lame pun for this one]

Seriously, I got nothin'.  The Trashbodies?  Homemen?  Frankly, El DeJason was forced enough, thank you very much.

I fear that an audio only clip will fail to do justice to Homebody's rendition of the surf/garage rock classic "Surfin' Bird."  What made her performance so sublime was watching the nonsense syllables consume the prompter.  They literally filled the entire monitor.  Over.  And over.  And over.  And over.  It's not a long song, but it seemed to go on forever.  Soo opined shortly after Homebody started singing that "it takes a lot of balls" to attempt this song.  I tend to agree.

Surfin' Bird

Homebody

patti labill

I honestly don't know what to make of "Lord" Bill Ramsey's performance.  I don't think he was tanking, but I was definitely among those who considered it to be "a little tank-y."  And actually, I honestly don't know what the distinction is between the two.  Maybe I'm splitting hairs.  But I guess this was to be expected.  Karaoke to the Death has roughly tripled in size since the last time he took the stage.  And the level of competition has increased exponentially.  Sports evolve, and records are made to be broken.  I just hope he doesn't wait another seven years to grace us with his presence again.  Bill may have been down this year, but I'm not counting him out.

Lady Marmalade

Bill Ramsey

the z-----s

I don't know what I expected from M-Dashes, but it wasn't what I saw.  He almost seemed to be enjoying the spotlight.  And he delivered a solid performance too.  There weren't any ba-ba's, but I never realized before how high this song gets on the chorus.  Given a song with a little more variety of pitch and tone, he could be one to watch in the future.  If, of course, he ever comes back.

Time of the Season

M-----l

peel and oates

There is perhaps no better indicator of the overall strength of the competition in KttD X than that the transcendent Emma Peel failed to garner a single vote.  From the 1980's source material through her signature off-key delivery to her awkwardly bubbly yet flat-footed dancing, her two performances last Sunday were vintage Peel.  And all for naught.  Emma is a giant of the sport and had long been considered by many to be the least naturally gifted singer in the field.  She could take any song - it was thought - and turn it into a winner.  It's safe to say that is no longer the case.  We truly are witnessing a New World KttD Order.  Karaoke to the Death has just entered the Modern Era.

Maneater

Emma Peel

One other notable development made glaringly obvious in KttD X is the great strides made by women in recent years.  Emma had long lamented the "old boys club" nature of early KttD bouts, but since she broke the gender barrier in KttD VII we have seen a paradigm shift.  This year's competition came down to two women battling it out for the top spot.  Three of the top five pre-game favorites were women.  And for the first time, the field was almost evenly split between men and women.  Even in the unlikely event that she never again takes home the Ramsey Cup, Emma has a legacy of which she can be proud.

I'm So Excited

Emma Peel

amyh(otchocolate)

One of my favorite things about Karaoke to the Death is the ridiculous conversations it inspires.  They're from another reality.  Tops on the list occurs during the song selection process, and involves me claiming that a certain song is not right for me because I can sing it too well.  Of course I can't sing it too well.  I've won this contest three times.  I don't sing anything well.  Then there's the one - which I had a couple of years ago when Alison took the Rock It by storm with her tremendous rendition of "Thunder Road" - which starts with an apology and a plea not to take the news that one is a contender as an insult.  And finally there's that conversation I had with AmyH last Sunday, in which I broke the unfortunate news that she's not as bad a singer as she thought.  Which, again, is absurd.  AmyH is a terrible singer.  This always happens to me; I always think of the flattering comments when it's way too late.

You Sexy Thing

AmyH